Posts Tagged ‘friends’

Stay Connected, Over Time

Problem:

You develop really close relationships with the people you work side by side with, then an opportunity comes along, or a reorganization, or for some reason you or they move to a different group and you never see them anymore.

Solution:

If you’ve developed a good friendship, it doesn’t take much effort to stay connected.  It could be months or even years later that you might run into them again and you would pick up right where you left off, it could be just like old times.  It’s always fun to see old friends.

What I’m suggesting is that you make an effort to make that happen, instead of it happening accidentally.

Every few months, or year, or whatever time period makes sense for your level of friendship, send your friends an email, or give them a phone call, or just show up at their desk and say “What’s up? How’s it going?  How’s the family?”  Maybe even take them out to lunch.

Reconnect and reminisce.  It’s so much fun, but it’s also very valuable and develops good grootship.  Not only will you find out about how they’re doing, but you’ll learn what’s happening in the old group, who’s doing what (did that one guy ever retire?), or how the company is working in that area.

This strengthens your connection, so in the future, if you ever need some information or help from that part of the company, you can just call up your friend and say “Do you know about…?”

This is easy, immediate, and free information or access that happens so much faster than filling out some form, or following a process, or calling a bunch of different people to find the right person you need.

Trusted networks are powerful.  It’s how things can get done fast in a large company.  So strengthen your network by staying connected, over long time periods.  You never know when you might need someone’s help, or when you might be able to help someone else.

Besides, it’s fun.

Say Thank You

Problem:

You get the feeling that people don’t have a good opinion of you.  Or, you don’t know what people think of you.  Or, you don’t have really good relationships that you can count on.  Or, you don’t feel that you’re a smooth, dynamic, charming speaker or conversationalist that people are attracted to.

Solution:

I know it sounds simple, but this is really the key to developing good relationships.  It is so easy to do.  The hard part is swallowing your pride.

Say ‘thank you’ often.  And mean it.

When you say ‘thank you’ to another person you are recognizing their contribution, you are saying that they provided something valuable to you and others.  You are humbling yourself because you are saying that you needed whatever they provided.  You might even be saying that they produced something better than what you could have produced.

Think deeply about the reasons why you wouldn’t say ‘thank you’ to someone and you’ll find that it is rooted in selfishness and pride.  Even if you didn’t think whatever they did was very useful, you can always learn something, maybe even how not to do it.  So the person should be thanked for their efforts.

Showing appreciation not only makes the recipient feel good, but it shows that you were paying attention, especially if you’re specific about what you liked.  So be specific.  It will help them do that part more.

And it’s easy.  Especially in online transactions. You can say it in emails, comments, and other various online discussions.  It spreads goodwill and builds your reputation as someone people like, because you’re always making people feel good.

So don’t worry about being a charming, dynamic personality.  Just be thankful and appreciative, and show it, and people will be drawn to you.  You’ll have more friends. 

And real friends are exactly what you need out there in the tough corporate world.